Hello...
What I am about to write is in a totally off-beat mood. I am very well aware that this is a public space but I am sure every woman goes through this phase at least one point of time in her life and hence I decided to write about it.
It is no doubt an understandable duty of a woman to take care of her household...be it the everyday chore, the kids and etc etc.. And when it comes to executing what she wishes for...it takes the last priority.
No, I am not grumbling but I am just trying to figure out how to get about it. The stress of handling things and squeezing in some time for yourself... For that very feeling of satisfaction on achieving something on your own. Who in this world does not wish to be a winner? Everyone struggles to meet targets, face new challenges and be proven . A woman is definitely known to be an expert at multitasking but by the time these multitasks end, exhaustion takes its toll and you know your last priority-your wish is waiting to be seen and heard!
And if you are lucky enough to find time for what you wish to do then the stress factor is ready to take its place and announce to everyone that an extra 'not so' required task has been performed and hence should be avoided........! And you are sentenced to serve humanity as this is your priority (I oblige!).. And if you are steady with what you want..then you get to voice your opinion. But here is where I face the dilemma. To me my kids are clearly my priority. I had this thing set in my mind a long time back. But it freaks me out to think I cant pursue my talent because I cant manage....makes me think I am incapable.
So I repeat what I did in my days of schooling when I was asked to prepare for medical entrance test(...and I was not interested.) Arts has always been my love but never pursued it.....maybe because I never voiced my wish....Anyway I just had a pencil with me and so I began sketching and got pretty good with pencil sketching. That's what I do now...sneak in between my chores and try to execute the plans I have working up in my head. I suffer from insomnia....people think I sleep a lot but I hardly sleep! My mind is so over-worked...because its constantly working ...when my hands are doing something else..my mind is thinking of things I should be doing when I get free..Okay! I am not here to talk about my medical condition but I am just trying to bring to your notice that being a female you have to be strong enough to put your stress aside and never let feelings like frustration,depression and other words related to that come in your mind.... IF you wish to pursue something of your interest. And it is such a blessing if you have a husband who not only supports you but also acknowledges it....fights for it. All you would wish to say is Thank you Allah Taala for this blessing!!
I did mention that I am in an off-beat mood...so just read it as an article and move on...
I would sign of with these verses by Ghalib which I find saying a lot these days...
'Hazaaron khwahishein aisi ki har khwahish pe damm nikle
Bahut nikle mere armaan lekin phir bhi kum nikle
-Afrah
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